Sunday is the Super Bowl, which means you have less than 48 hours to prepare. And we’re not talking about playing in the game. We are talking about how to not only survive, but thrive as you make small talk with that guy from accounting’s wife at your best from middle school’s Super Bowl Party while eating your share of the 11.2 million pounds of potato chips.
But don’t worry, Complete PR has you covered with everything you didn’t want to know, but need to know. This is the stuff not found on any of the network pregame shows. These are the cold-hard facts you need.
Five Random Facts to Share at a Super Bowl Party, according to John
- Neither the Chiefs nor the 49ers started their lives as NFL franchises, yet are playing for the league’s title. How did this come about? The Niners originally started in rival league called the All-America Football Conference. That league disbanded after the 1949 season, and its most financially solid/successful on the field teams joined the NFL in 1950. The Chiefs started as the Dallas Texans in 1960 in the American Football League, which forced a merger with the NFL that led to the Super Bowl.
- Long-time Chiefs owner Lamar Hunt was the person who coined the phrase for the Super Bowl based on a toy his kids had — the SuperBall (which was awesome by the way, you could bounce that thing a mile).
- Someone will use the phrase “65 Toss Power Trap” during the party you are at. What does it mean? It is a nod to the classic NFL Films’ highlights from Super Bowl IV where then Chiefs coach Hank Stram was audiotaped. His various phrases like “matriculate” entered the sports lexicon and stayed there because the highlights of him spouting of phrases and hurrahs were brilliant and hilarious. The 65 Toss Power Trap was a play that led to a touchdown for the Chiefs while Stram and his coaches went on and on about on the sidelines. Just watch it here.
- 83 percent of Americans only know Roman Numerals because of the Super Bowl.
- The average national anthem sung before the Super Bowl takes about one minute and 55 seconds from “Oh” to “Brave.”
Tips for those people who hate football, but are watching the game because you have medically diagnosed FOMO, according to Anna.
- If you don’t know what’s going on in the game, don’t talk. Don’t ask questions. Don’t pretend you know what the refs are saying, and for goodness sake, do not ask “is that good or bad?” after a play.
- Repeat step one. Arguably the only tip you need.
- You can almost never go wrong with saying “wow” after something big happens. A calm, monotone “wow” could either imply shell-shocked admiration or complete disgust.
- Not sure which specific girl needs to read this, but don’t spend all weekend trying to pick out a cute color-coordinating outfit to match his team’s colors. I promise he won’t notice, or care. He’s going to be watching the game.
- Don’t ask what happened to Clemson and LSU. That was a different title game.
Five Tips on What Foods to Share, according to Ariel.
- Cheese. All kinds. In ball form, or sliced, or shredded to top other things. Always a crowd-pleaser.
- Chili, to keep the “bowl” theme going, and it’s going to be cold in the Upstate.
- All manner of dips — spinach artichoke, creamy goat cheese, bacon and sour cream, guacamole. Google is your friend. So is Trader Joe’s.
- Items to dip that aren’t chips — raw veggies are a vehicle with quite the crunch that rivals chips and will also keep your vegan, gluten-free friend’s passive aggressive food complaints to a minimum.
- Ice cream sandwiches — when was the last time you bought ice cream sandwiches? If you can’t remember, the Super Bowl is the perfect time. Hand-held desserts are the way to go.
Five Super Bowl Predictions, from the entire Complete PR team.
- There has never been a shutout in Super Bowl history. It ain’t gonna happen tonight.
- Security will try to arrest Bill Belichick as he tries to steal the Super Bowl trophy at half time, but Gronk and Tom Brady will come and save him as always. The NFL will just shrug it off. (Note, there is precedence for this. A Montreal Canadiens fan tried to steal the Stanley Cup during a playoff game in the early 1960s when it became evident the Flying Frenchmen weren’t going to win it.
- You won’t remember the much-hyped ads by next weekend.
- If you attend a party, at least three people will be happy that the Patriots aren’t in the Super Bowl.
- Demi Lovato will break the two-minute in singing the National Anthem.
Now, get out there and try to wake up Monday morning.
